Passion lost

Recently, I really don't have the passion to study not even Anwar's class. My school teacher said I look lazy and lifeless. I confessed to her that I do feel like giving up in my studies, go out and work, at least not to waste any of my time anymore. But then she told me that I can choose they government school road. Why didn't I think about it? I did think about going for form 6 but because of those things that happened lately, I thought about going out to work instead of wasting money and time. Also, maybe I've been interrupted that I totally forgot about the form 6 option. Of course, I still wish to be a pilot. But thinking of the cost of that course and I won't be able to come home often make me think about giving up too. I do know that I can't have a bright future without a SPM certificate but I just feel like giving up with words can't describe. So for now, not to disappoint my mom, I'll just stick with the form 6 plan, and with the six months of free time, maybe I can get a good job or I'm lucky enough to get into a flight academy with full scholarship. 2014 wishlist, first, get flying colours for SPM! Even if I have no passion to do so, I still have to force myself to. For my future, for them. Don't really think I can do it, but I've been living in a very bad condition for so long I don't think that is a tough thing to me I guess.